2014년 12월 7일 일요일

Week 16
<final draft>

Throughout the evolution, some physiological changes, such as genetic or physical variation, have occurred to human. For instance, human evolves from ape to Cro-Magnon. The changes are quite remarkable as a really long period elapsed, which started from our ancestors. However, as contrast with physiological human evolution, I think evolution of social skills appears to individual and can occur in short time. For instance, it is my case ; My handwriting was too terrible to communicate with other by letter. Therefore, in community, such as my school, teachers mind checking my working done by handwriting. And then, I decided to alter my illegible handwriting into great one. I really tried to achieve improvement of my handwriting. And, not many days after, I could receive favorable evaluation of my handwriting from SAM teacher : "Wow, it's Evolution!" This instance shows that people can achieve evolution of social skill (handwriting - the means of communicating with others) in just short time. However, there is an wondering point : Is it possible to achieve social evolution, even if society doesn't allow people to do so? I believe that people can achieve social evolution perfectly, despite social limitations.
Someone could have some social limitations which interrupt their social evolution. For instance, in India, there had been caste system. This system separated people into four levels, shudra, vaishya, kshatriya, and brahmin. Brahmin was the highest level, Kshatriya was the second one, Vaishya was the third one, and Shudra was the lowest one. This system led brahmin to have superiority and shudra to be treated with contempt. Therefore, Shudra and Vaishya were difficult to improve their social skills. However, Gandhi who was an Indian, Vaishya, was successful to achieve social evolution. He led to independence of India from United kingdom. The key was his strong willingness to achieve social evolution, despite his level, Vaishya. Therefore, I think that even if the society doesn't allow someone to achieve social evolution, people can overcome any social limitations with strong willingness to do so.
Many people believe that people cannot achieve social evolution perfectly due to their social limitations. However, there are three incidents disproving that. First one is , as mentioned before, of Gandhi's, his social limitation is the level of caste, Varshyia. Second one is of Nelson Mandlea's. Nelson Mandela is a South African. His social limitation was racial discrimination. He had often been discriminated by White - South African and the other white persons. However, in spite of racial disrimination, he tried to resolve the problem caused by racial discrimination. As a result, he won a Nobel prize for peace. In addition, he finally became the president of South Africa at 1994. The third incident is of Jeong Ji Hoon's. He is a Korean singer. His alis is 'RAIN'. When he was young, he had suffered from really severe poor. Once, in night, he wanted to drink water, but the light was gone out. He rummaged the table, and found the kettle. He drank water and felt the water was so cool. But, he also chewed something in the water. Surprisingly, something he chewed was the eggs of spiders! This story shows how he was poor. However, he didn't give up his dream, dancer, despite of his social limitaion, poverty. As a result, he became the most famous K-pop star. His teacher Park Jin Yeong (JYP) said that 'Ji Hoon (RAIN) really tried hard to become the dancer. He always practiced the dancing even during the break time.' It indicates that the key to achieve social evolution depends on the strong willingness.
The opponent will say that people cannot achieve social evolution perfectly. due to their own social limitations. Sometimes, the society doesn't allow them to achieve social evolution. However, as mentioned before, the key to achieve social evolution depends on how strong willingness is, which isn't related to social limitation. The three incidents of Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, and Jeong Ji Hoon, support to prove this fact. It is true that there are some social limitations in our society, but people can overcome their social limitations with their own strong willingness.
There are many social limitations, such as the caste system, the poverty, and the racial discrimination. However, these limitations could be changed by individual. If someone has strong willingness, they must be successful to achieve social evolution.

2014년 11월 16일 일요일

Week 13

<second Draft>

Throughout the evolution, some physiological changes, such as genetic or physical variation, have occurred to human. For instance, human evolves from ape to Cro-Magnon. The changes are quite remarkable as a really long period elapsed, which started from our ancestors. However, as contrast with physiological human evolution, I think evolution of social skills appears to individual and can occur in short time. For instance, it is my case ; My handwriting was too terrible to communicate with other by letter. Therefore, in community, such as my school, teachers mind checking my working done by handwriting. And then, I decided to alter my illegible handwriting into great one. I really tried to achieve improvement of my handwriting. And, not many days after, I could receive favorable evaluation of my handwriting from SAM teacher : "Wow, it's Evolution!" This instance shows that people can achieve evolution of social skill (handwriting - the means of communicating with others) in just short time. However, there is an wondering point : Is it possible to achieve social evolution, even if society doesn't allow people to do so? I believe that people can achieve social evolution perfectly, despite social limitations.
Someone could have some social limitations which interrupt their social evolution. For instance, in India, there had been caste system. This system separated people into four levels, shudra, vaishya, kshatriya, and brahmin. Brahmin was the highest level, Kshatriya was the second one, Vaishya was the third one, and Shudra was the lowest one. This system led brahmin to have superiority and shudra to be treated with contempt. Therefore, Shudra and Vaishya were difficult to improve their social skills. However, Gandhi who was an Indian, Vaishya, was successful to achieve social evolution. He led to independence of India from United kingdom. The key was his strong willingness to achieve social evolution, despite his level, Vaishya. Therefore, I think that even if the society doesn't allow someone to achieve social evolution, people can overcome any social limitations with strong willingness to do so.
Many people believe that people cannot achieve social evolution perfectly due to their social limitations. However, there are three incidents disproving that. First one is , as mentioned before, of Gandhi's, his social limitation is the level of caste, Varshyia. Second one is of Nelson Mandlea's. Nelson Mandela is a South African. His social limitation was racial discrimination. He had often been discriminated by White - South African and the other white persons. However, in spite of racial disrimination, he tried to resolve the problem caused by racial discrimination. As a result, he won a Nobel prize for peace. In addition, he finally became the president of South Africa at 1994. The third incident is of Jeong Ji Hoon's. He is a Korean singer. His alis is 'RAIN'. When he was young, he had suffered from really severe poor. Once, in night, he wanted to drink water, but the light was gone out. He rummaged the table, and found the kettle. He drank water and felt the water was so cool. But, he also chewed something in the water. Surprisingly, something he chewed was the eggs of spiders! This story shows how he was poor. However, he didn't give up his dream, dancer, despite of his social limitaion, poverty. As a result, he became the most famous K-pop star. His teacher Park Jin Yeong (JYP) said that 'Ji Hoon (RAIN) really tried hard to become the dancer. He always practiced the dancing even during the break time.' It indicates that the key to achieve social evolution depends on the strong willingness.
The opponent will say that people cannot achieve social evolution perfectly. due to their own social limitations. Sometimes, the society doesn't allow them to achieve social evolution. However, as mentioned before, the key to achieve social evolution depends on how strong willingness is, which isn't related to social limitation. The three incidents of Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, and Jeong Ji Hoon, support to prove this fact. It is true that there are some social limitations in our society, but people can overcome their social limitations with their own strong willingness.
There are many social limitations, such as the caste system, the poverty, and the racial discrimination. However, these limitations could be changed by individual. If someone has strong willingness, they must be successful to achieve social evolution.

2014년 10월 27일 월요일

Week 10

<conclusion>

There are many social limitations, such as the caste system, the poverty, and the racial discrimination. However, these limitations could be changed by individual. If someone has strong willingness, they must be successful to achieve social evolution.
Week 9

<refutation and concession>

1. What is my thesis?

Despite some social limitations, people achieve social evolution perfectly.

2. What is the opposite position?
People cannot achieve social evolution due to their own social limitaions.

3. What arguments can I anticipate?
The society doesn't often allow someone to achieve social evolution.

4. How will I counter those arguments?

The key to achieve social evolution depends on how strong the willingness is, which isn't related to social limitation.



My Refutation and Concession

The opponent will say that people cannot achieve social evolution perfectly. due to their own social limitations. Sometimes, the society doesn't allow them to achieve social evolution. However, as mentioned before, the key to achieve social evolution depends on how strong willingness is, which isn't related to social limitation. The three incidents of Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, and Jeong Ji Hoon, support to prove this fact. It is true that there are some social limitations in our society, but people can overcome their social limitations with their own strong willingness.

Week 8

<confirmation>

1. What is my thesis?

Despite some social limitations, people achieve social evolution perfectly.

2. What types of source am I using to defend my thesis?
I am using three incidents of famous persons.

3. Are my arguments mostly based on evidence, logic or emotion?

My arguments are based on evidence ; Three incidents of famous persons. - Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, and Jeong Ji Hoon.

My Confirmation

Many people believe that people cannot achieve social evolution perfectly due to their social limitations. However, there are three incidents disproving that. First one is , as mentioned before, of Gandhi's, his social limitation is the level of caste, Varshyia. Second one is of Nelson Mandlea's. Nelson Mandela is a South African. His social limitation was racial discrimination. He had often been discriminated by White - South African and the other white persons. However, in spite of racial disrimination, he tried to resolve the problem caused by racial discrimination. As a result, he won a Nobel prize for peace. In addition, he finally became the president of South Africa at 1994. The third incident is of Jeong Ji Hoon's. He is a Korean singer. His alis is 'RAIN'. When he was young, he had suffered from really severe poor. Once, in night, he wanted to drink water, but the light was gone out. He rummaged the table, and found the kettle. He drank water and felt the water was so cool. But, he also chewed something in the water. Surprisingly, something he chewed was the eggs of spiders! This story shows how he was poor. However, he didn't give up his dream, dancer, despite of his social limitaion, poverty. As a result, he became the most famous K-pop star. His teacher Park Jin Yeong (JYP) said that 'Ji Hoon (RAIN) really tried hard to become the dancer. He always practiced the dancing even during the break time.' It indicates that the key to achieve social evolution depends on the strong willingness.

2014년 10월 26일 일요일

Week 7

<narration>

My persuasive argument thesis is: Despite some social limitations, people achieve social evolution perfectly. 

1. What do people already know about my topic?

Everyone knows that there are some social limitations interrupting someone to achieve social evolution, such as the gap between rich and poor or racial discrimination or caste system.

2. What research has already been done about my topic?



These images are good for showing the caste system.


3. What are the implications of my argument (What if I'm right? What if I'm right and people ignore me?)

Like caste system, even if the society doesn't allow someone to achieve social evolution, people can overcome any social limitations with strong willingness to do so, like the case of Gandhi.

My Narration

Someone could have some social limitations which interrupt their social evolution. For instance, in India, there had been caste system. This system separated people into four levels, shudra, vaishya, kshatriya, and brahmin. Brahmin was the highest level, Kshatriya was the second one, Vaishya was the third one, and Shudra was the lowest one. This system led brahmin to have superiority and shudra to be treated with contempt. Therefore, Shudra and Vaishya were difficult to improve their social skills. However, Gandhi who was an Indian, Vaishya, was successful to achieve social evolution. He led to independence of India from United kingdom. The key was his strong willingness to achieve social evolution, despite his level, Vaishya. Therefore, I think that even if the society doesn't allow someone to achieve social evolution, people can overcome any social limitations with strong willingness to do so.

Week 6

<introduction>

Throughout the evolution, some physiological changes, such as genetic or physical variation, have occurred to human. For instance, human evolves from ape to Cro-Magnon. The changes are quite remarkable as a really long period elapsed, which started from our ancestors.  However, as contrast with physiological human evolution, I think evolution of social skills appears to individual and can occur in short time. For instance, it is my case ; My handwriting was too terrible to communicate with other by letter. Therefore, in community, such as my school, teachers mind checking my working done by handwriting. And then, I decided to alter my illegible handwriting into great one. I really tried to achieve improvement of my handwriting. And, not many days after, I could receive favorable evaluation of my handwriting from SAM teacher : "Wow, it's Evolution!" This instance shows that people can achieve evolution of social skill (handwriting - the means of communicating with others) in just short time. However, there is an wondering point : Is it possible to achieve social evolution, even if society doesn't allow people to do so? I believe that people can achieve social evolution perfectly, despite social limitations.


1. Attention grabber -
I attracted the audience by the physiological human evolution. Then I pointed out another meaning of evolution, which relates to improvement of social skills, through the incidents of my handwriting.

2. Explains the topic -
In the attention grabber I introduce social evolution. However, a question occurs ; Is it always possible to achieve social evolution, in spite of some social limitations?

3. My thesis -
I believe that people can achieve social evolution perfectly, even if society doesn't allow them to do so.